I drink a lot of beer, more than I should, and I drink a variety of beer - different brands of cheap, different bottles of good. So I figured I'd start quick one paragraph blurbs of all the new beers (at least as yet to be reviewed on this blog) beers I drink. Hopefully the other dumbasses who contribute will also join in. I have (immediately, like right now) developed a five-faceted ranking system, where the beer can be judged on 1 to 5 scale in five categories, to be made up and outlined below. These are added up to make an overall score that is then divided by five, and then I pretend beer is elegant and add star to whatever whole number/fraction combo such divisional methods give me as a final rating.
Category one would be affordability, meaning how much does that shit cost. Category two would be destroyability, meaning - per every sixteen ounces - how fucked will you get. (It should be noted if you are drinking beer to not get drunk, you are a dumbass, because there are many far better tasting things to drink on this earth to not get drunk to. Grape Kool-Aid with extra sugar for example. Also, ice water.) Category three will label aesthetic, because let's face it... packaging is everything in consumer culture. Category four will be corporate master, meaning who the fuck makes that shit, because the more deeply entrenched a company/government/neighbor is, the more likely they are to be injecting chemicals into my innards. And the final category will be overall ambiance, or the general feeling I get from it all, that unexplained by science internal intuition. So there it is going to be, just like that. Lucky for you, I'm drinking tonight, so shit can start going down right now.
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