RETARDAR: White Halfwit Town Sweeper

I have a special magnetism called Retardar that draws me into odd interactions with other people. I am not sure what it comes from, but it's always been a curse/blessing on my life. Well, I was painting this building on the main intersection of my hometown, and seven thousand people a day would ask me if the store was opening again, but it wasn't. After a while, I'd do that old man thing where I'd go, "If I had a dollar for everybody that asked me that, I could open the store myself." If I had a dollar for every time stupid cliches pissed me off after passing my lips, I'd have hellafied Ben Franklins in the bank coffers. Anyways, there's this guy who always is sweeping up around town near the old post office (the hefty white dude not Jesse, if you know the area), and he got to chatting me up. This was before the Chinese earthquake, but after one in Nebraska or somewhere weird like that, asking me if I knew about plate tectonics and all. He said, "If God starts shifting those tectonic plates against each other, it could make a earthquake that could swallow a city the size of Dayton, Ohio. What are we gonna do if God starts doing that?" And I was intrigued by his combination of belief in god with an understanding of science, and how they combined together, and though he seems to most probably like a dim-witted big guy from Of Mice and Men type town character, I was glad to talk him up, though I was also ready to break the conversation so I could finish loading my ladders and go home. I got all my shit strapped down, climbed in the truck, yelled at him across the parking lot a friendly, "Take it easy." He raised his hand into a thumb's up sign at me, very friendly like. I waved back, but he jabbed the thumb's up towards me emphatically. So I gave him a thumb's up back. I think that's the first time I've done a thumb's up since I was like six years old. It was empowering.