We took the kids to the Science Museum in Richmond last weekend, to get some science and see the Imaxes movie pictures about the Grand Canyon. I hadn't seen an Imax flick since I was in high school and me and four other dudes skipped school, dropped acid, popped into a small ass '88 Dodge Omni, and went to the Science Museum in Richmond, because we were high-minded delinquents. My 4-year-old was right at the cusp of not being able to handle such a gigantic surround-sound movie, and the whitewater rapids scenes caused her to curl up in my lap and hide her face. The movie was good like most Imaxes movies, except they always have to have some sort of save-the-earth bent, and be like, "You know, the Colorado River is almost dried up because of overuse by man. So now watch us ride through these awesome rapids." And then at the end, they tell you to get different showerheads to save 500 gallons of water a year.
An eventual thing I'm gonna do when I win the lottery, to help expedite wasting my money and being poor, thus pure, again, is buy me a museum with one of the Imaxxes in it, and start hiring people to make hellbent Imaxxes, like instead of awesome whitewater shit, you walk through a ghetto ass neighborhood, and then have to run, camera in first person, because some dude is gonna rob you. Or that really nice space age shit they do at the beginning of Imaxxes to show you how awesome it could be but they only do it for ten seconds? I'd make a whole movie of that, like surround-sound Tron 2008. Because most of those movies are geared towards drug abuse, but then they put them in science museums and confuse the issue. Or Imaxxes porn, but some high concept porn, like about how conventional farming is so wasteful of resources, and then you pick up some hot earth mama in Whole Foods and have sex with her, then explain how organic farming is so much better, a couple hot hippie chicks make out while weeding on a carrot farm or something, or probably zucchinis so they can be used erotically. That'd be a great Imaxxes movie, and would still be as scientific as the Grand Canyon one I watched.
They just banned having a strip club across the street from the Science Museum in Richmond, because a Children's Museum is right beside it, and didn't want to expose kids to that type of shit. But I remember when that shit first opened - the Science Museum - and my school taking a field trip there, to the big city of Richmond, and there was a porn theater right across the street. I guess porn was more acceptable then, not yet so far removed from it's glory days and golden age of Holmes and Seka and the like.
(As a side note, I had an older guy I worked with when I was 16 convince me that I should try acid at least once, just to see hallucinatory things and realize everything I think I know is not necessarily what I know or what it is. I am very thankful for his influence on my life back then. If you are a lost teenager wasting time inside the internets, I encourage you to do hallucinogenics to expand yourself. But don't sit in front of the computer when you do it. Mechanisms like a computer can be too much when realizing reality is totally subjective.)
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