(1988, Geffen Records)
Back in the days, I had a like third generation 90 minute cassette dub of the Some Kinda Orange live GNR that was much wanted, as Appetite for Destruction was like a prettier Motorhead record that slutty chicks didn't mind listening to while you fingered them. So I had the live shit already when this album came out. And to be honest, I got it on tape back then... actually got two copies for Christmas because I was asking for that shit from family. But I knew the live shit already, so it was nothing new.
The acoustic side though, mind crushing. Like, today everything's been lumped by history under the umbrella of "hair metal". But then, there was some of that shit that was kosher, and some that wasn't. Like, a self-respecting delinquent ass teenager of that day would never be caught pumping like Cinderella or Bon Jovi or even really Skid Row or most of that shit considered "hair metal" by VH1 expert talking heads. But GNR, at least through this album, was still in that acceptable realm. I guess the easiest criteria was if it was in RIP magazine or not, because they'd have shit like GNR right next to King Diamond right next to Megadeth (although I vaguely remember RIP getting all weird at some point too, so don't hold me to that side-of-my-head talking).
"Patience", of course, is the most famous hit from the acoustic side, still catching radio play to this day, as an example of Guns N' Roses smooth ass side, complementing the drug-addled beastliness of Appetite. But man, the real hit off this album (or EP or whatever the fuck) was "One In A Million", which, if I was one of those self-important faggots on VH1 talking about some stupid assed list show to fill programming up between Flavor of Love marathons, I'd say was the last real major label rock-n-roll song. I am old school in that rock-n-roll is about pussy and mind-altering substances for the most part, plus maybe powerful machines like guns or fast cars. Rock-n-roll is not meant to educate or empower or be open-minded and politically correct. It's about putting things in your body that make you wilder than normal and putting your thing into other wild bodies. And even though VH1 will have you believe Nirvana held a press conference on MTV and it was like a light switch changed everything, basically it was a smooth Jew music industry overlord move to capitalize on a new generation of naive young white dudes making music and cycle out the older guys who had ran their gimmick silly with shit like the aforementioned Cinderellas and Wingers and Warrants and robot-created rock music like that. "One In A Million" though, is some real shit. It's angry and fucked up, yet makes perfect sense. The world is not multi-ethnic non-denominational martini parties; it is shitty foreigners ripping you off on phone cards and crackheads hassling you too long to buy some stolen necklaces outside the Greyhound station. In fact, to over-analyze things, "One In A Million", by being so prejudiced, shows faith in something better existing - a better place without AIDS and crackheads and terrorism, albeit expressed rather Indiana whitebreadedly, whereas the later, allegedly superior in every way grunge music (another ridiculous umbrella term, before you think I'm an old codger out of touch with anything post-'91/pre-9/11, which I'm not saying I'm not either) was jaded and cynical and lacked a hope for a better place. They had given up.
I am sad that we live in a world so open-minded it is closed towards "One In A Million" being accepted as easily one of the best rock-n-roll anthems of the past twenty years. I still play it regularly, so much so that my copy of this on vinyl is all scratched up. I have kept an eye out for a new replacement copy, because I need one. "Move to the City" skips something awful, but you can really hear the dings and scratches from overplaying, or more properly over putting on turntable while drunk and stumbly, on the acoustic side. And I'll be playing "One In A Million" till the day I stop listening to the musics. You could give a million Kid Rocks a million record deals and put them in a nice studio for a million years, and they'd never come up with anything half as great.
(On a nerdy side note, I've always enjoyed the math behind being "one in a million", because with eight billion people on earth, by my last consultation with a used book store almanac, there's still like eight thousand people just like you.)
No comments:
Post a Comment