(2000, Landspeed Records)
Man, I can't remember how, if it was on a mixtape of what, but I knew who Thirstin Howl III was back when I worked at this shitty painting company in Farmville, but we were finishing up a job in Richmond, and it was only me and my boy Rob aka Va. Canibus aka the Black Clever Star, riding back and forth to way above Richmond up near Hanover County, and we'd stop at Willie's Records in Southside because I knew the spot to stock up and he knew it as the black folks record store, and we were in there and I was picking out 12-inch singles and came across this with the big basic block letters, and I had to buy it. Rob always bought a couple tapes that we'd pump in the work van on the way back home, but my records would just be sitting there, waiting to make it to the trailer and get played. This song was the fucking greatest on multiple levels. First off, Thirstin Howl III is the greatest freestyle style rapper to ever have records, and this, along with "Brooklyn Hard Rocks", is his finest moments. But what makes this song even better, as if it needed that, was the whole Rob factor, because at the time, he lived with his moms, and actually shared a bedroom with his brother who was in like 6th grade, in bunk beds. Rob was like 22 and we'd drink beer together and he'd go play dice behind the Elk's Lodge and end up cracking some dude in the head with a baseball bat, but go home and sleep in the bunk beds with his little bro. And it wasn't ugly. His mom was nice as shit, a real cool lady. In fact, I rode through there like two years ago trying to get up with Rob, and this older black dude kept looking at me, he always seemed to be hanging out whenever I came through, and he probably thought I was there to buy weed or coke or something, as it's like three blocks from the projects and we used to buy mad weed there from a dude named Sheephead. I circled around and asked the old dude if Rob still lived there, and he was like, "Why? Who asking?" and I told him we used to be tight but I ain't seen him in years and he was like, "Yeah, I'm his daddy. I'll tell his mom." Next day, his mom called the number I left and gave me Rob's home number, he had a kid now and all that. I called like 19 times, but my caller ID says my wife's name because like any good piece of shit, none of the bills are in my name, except for shit we ain't gonna pay for so it can fuck up my credit and not her's, so nobody ever answered unless they answered and said, "HELLO!!!!" and then hung up. I would imagine Rob was probably fucking around and his ol' lady would see the caller ID and start tripping. I never got up wit Rob until finding him inside the facebooks, but I think his facebook account might be run by a robot judging from some of his strange posts. Who knew that invasion of the body snatchers would be through a social networking site and wouldn't end up actually killing us but just annoying us with broken Russian programming and Nigerian english?
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