Beginning next Monday, I will start doing these really dorky mathematical nerd college basketball related lists on the blog, like a bunch of them that will be interesting to very few people, and really serve no purpose on this earth other than to enable me to waste a bunch of time with some trifling bullshit. But I’m trying to hold true to the purpose of this blog, which is to just throw the dumb shit I like out there, and whether anyone who may or may not read this blog enjoys it or not, I can’t worry about that. It gets hard as you become aware of an audience because you play for that audience as opposed to playing for yourself (or you edit yourself so as to not offend someone or reveal something too personal or whatever... unfortunately for those close to me, I’m not really ever ashamed of anything, and my stupidest moments make me proud of just how stupid I can be, if that makes any sense). But with the gradual decline of the Washington Redskins, and the incline of the VCU Rams college basketball team in recent years, I’ve started to indulge in the college basketball fandom pretty heavily, more so than probably since my early 20s when I would lift weights and watch ESPN every night of the week in the wintertime.
Let’s be honest... something happened with American dudes in the 80s, whether it be fluoridated water or immunizations creating mild autism in us all or rapid-fire TV images causing ADHD in everybody, but we became far more obsessive with minor things. Back then, as a kid, I had thousands of baseball cards, and I’d sort them all out into one particular way, look at the stacks, and then sort it all out again in a different sort of way, continuously. I’m sure my parents were like “what the fuck is wrong with this kid?”
So basically, although it would seem like I’m a word nerd, I’m actually a numbers nerd too (well-equipped with multi-nerd abilities). In fact, a lot of the fiction writing I do is built in numbered layers like a house frame, then drywall, then finishing the drywall, then final painting. It’s mad nonsense, and if this was still the 1910s, I would’ve long ago been committed, but luckily our government can’t afford mental health joints anymore. Last year or the year before, I did the Sporting 14 lists each day of the NCAA tournament for the guys playing that day who had scored the most points. This was interesting because there was a combination of being a solid player as well as staying in school that got guys onto the lists. Well, I decided like a fucking fool to apply that to all sorts of stupid conference tournaments this year, creating two lists per conference. The first one will be the 14 guys who scored the most points in their conference tournaments the past four years, and the second is guys playing in this year’s conference tournament who have scored the most in them previously. The first list will be fun because I’m gonna look up all these fuckers and see where they are now. Not that many guys make it to the NBA, and there’s this elaborate and retarded multi-league system that spreads throughout Europe and Israel and even South America that all these prominent college players go to. It may not be so interesting for a major conference like the Big East where all the former stars are in the NBA, but for a mid-major conference, that shit can be some long-distance bouncing around, even in the span of a couple years out of college. As for the returning players lists, that’ll give a head’s up for who to watch in that conference tournament, who’ll be making a probable impact. I’m sure mad basketball dorks will stumble upon this blog during their March Madness frenzy of a local variety.
What I’m trying to lay out here is this will be a continous thing for the next month until the end of the NCAA tournament, and if you are not a basketball fan, it will probably bore you to death. And if you a basketball fan it will probably bore you to death. But most of what I do is just a long drawn-out launching pad for me to say retarded things, which I’m sure I will. I’m not really able to control that; it’s just how I am. I think I feel like a dork for everything I do, so I try to make up for it by wise-cracking some bullshit nonsense all the time. But whatever it is, it is what it is, and it shall be here starting on Monday, so I wanted you to know what’s going on. (Although I guess if I do this purely for myself I’m just telling my own self that, and wouldn’t I already know this by now? Man, fuck a brave new world.)
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