S14: NCAA Tournament Top Returning Scorers - First Round Friday

Hey, here’s the stupid list like yesterday, but for today...
#1: Kalin Lucas (Michigan State guard; 124 previous points in the NCAA tournament) - Led the Spartans to the Final Four last year, but they've not been that dominant this year. Still, veteran, tourney-tested players yadda yadda yadda.
#2: Jerry Smith (Louisville guard; 107 previous points in the NCAA tourney) - Plainest name in the game.
#3: Raymar Morgan (Michigan State forward; 104 previous points in the NCAA tourney) - Another star from last year, and Tom Izzo is Tom Izzo, which means the NCAA fixes shit so he looks awesome even when he's not.
#4: Edgar Sosa (Louisville guard; 104 previous points in the NCAA tourney) - Has been playing for Rick Pitino for nine years.
#5: Jon Scheyer (Duke guard; 76 previous points in the NCAA tourney) - Scheyer face fuckwad.
#6: Greivis Vasquez (Maryland guard; 69 previous points in the NCAA tourney) - I used to hate him, but now I can dig him, and for maybe the first time in my life I shall root for the stupid Terrapins in the tourney, even though Gary Williams is an asshole.
#7: E'Twaun Moore (Purdue guard; 69 previous points in the NCAA tourney) - Purdue is doomed.
#8: Durrell Summers (Michigan State guard; 69 previous points in the NCAA tourney) - Names like Durrell are awesome when fat diabetes-eaten black grandmas say it real loud through a screen door with a southern twang and the air is thick with humidity.
#9: Edwin Ubiles (Siena guard/forward; 67 previous points in the NCAA tourney) - A Siena Saint, already on this list before the tourney starts. They are the critical talking head darling upset pick of the first round, and certainly rocked that shit last year.
#10: Jason Bohannon (Wisconsin guard; 67 previous points in the NCAA tourney) - First head shop I ever bought paraphenalia at was called Bohannon's. R.I.P. Grace Street in Richmond. Your soul is missed.
#11: Chris Allen (Michigan State guard; 67 previous points in the NCAA tourney) - Never heard of him, but he is here.
#12: Chris Kramer (Purdue guard; 64 previous points in the NCAA tourney) - The sports section from last Sunday still in my bathroom is folded over to a page where this dude is having a rebound ripped from his weak ass by a Minnesota Golden Gopher.
#13: Jajuan Johnson (Purdue forward/center; 63 previous points in the NCAA tourney) - Triple J.
#14: Trevon Hughes (Wisconsin guard; 60 previous points in the NCAA tourney) - You can pretty much put the same blurb for Trevon that I wrote for Durrell, except make it in Philadelphia with less twang.