Music is what saves me. Without it, I'd be dead. And times change, that's for sure. I am not playing slabs of vinyl on ill-begotten turntables anymore, as the kitchen desktop computer with Itunes loaded full of stolen digital tracks tends to be the main night time stereo of my life... all very electronic and unreal and disconnected. Yet it helps ease the day's frantic breaths back down to normal breathing, and eventually I can convince myself that I guess I'm getting somewhere with this one ragged life.
And the music I enjoy has become more electronic because of this contributing environment. What I would've thought some punk ass bullshit a few years back is now soothing good shit. It's a combination of my kid being into electronic music, and equipment becoming cheaper and low-fi so that I can do strange hip hoptronic country outlaw bullshit as well production-wise as Pussy Galore in the camper behind my house.
I have a turntable that plugs into a computer. I didn't even have a computer when I was my oldest kid's age. I had the Atari 2600.
The weakening of my mind is a definite thing, I can feel it. Cell phones, wi fi, HAARP beams, fluoridated toothpaste, EMF tasers, tectonic shifts along the Appalachian ridgeline releasing mind-numbing Active Denial gases into the air... it's all going on at once, converging upon my now. But the human body is a fucking amazing thing. You can chop an oak tree into slabs and see the circles of years of existence. I have those same scars on me, but you cut a cross-section of my leg and it's not there, as I shed my skin like a snake, constantly healing, even in the worst of situations. Electronic mind clutter is no difference, so my warped mind seeks refuge in new art forms and new musics and new ways of expressing the unexplainable internal struggle in whatever words it has left to use. And it helps stabilize the deteriorating mindstate. Like planting oats on the blown away dunes of a rapidly eroding shoreline. It ain't gonna fix the problem, or make it like it was before it got all fucked up by what's been done, but I guess it helps. It certainly can't hurt. Like right now I think I could use a good infusion of go-go music, a half gallon jar of that cayenne pepper maple syrup cleansing lemonade, and some holy basil tincture, to keep my grey matter from turning black so fast. But the go-go music is a major part of that equation, and helps make tomorrow get here right on time.
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