J.J. Krupert Top 13 Countdown - May '11 Intro

If this was for real though the first of May, as one would expect being I am stone cold launching the start of the May J.J. Krupert Countdown of Background (noise to my day-to-day travails and travels and tall tales and soul rattles/cybertron battles), then today would be Beltane, a traditionally pagan ass day which pagan used to mean big bonfires and probably some nudity and drinking fermented things but now unfortunately mostly means people with dark hair with too many bumper stickers on the back of a late model Honda. We had a marriage ceremony of public spectacle on Beltane weekend a while back, complete with masked women calling in directions, rhinestone overalls, 5-gallons of tomato wine, bluegrass music, and ridiculous explosions. It was tight.
May first was also May Day which was when communist Russia had it's pimp parade of military might. I live in a small town that always thinks it is about to do awesome things but never does, mostly because the people are transplanted without vision and kind of think if you sweep the streets then everybody is going to parade through for no reason with their Visa cards sticking out their pockets like a $100 in the front pocket of a man trolling for gay sex at medium-sized city public parks. I think it would be a most beneficial thing to have a public kinetic sculpture race of some sort down the main thoroughfare (which oddly enough intersects perpendicularly with Main Street), on Beltane/May Day weekend, and make a big affair of it. Throw some music in the park downtown where they try to do that when they can, and just get busy. We have a big 4th of July Fireman's Parade, so you make up some sort of public spectacle to go with the fishing tournament on Labor Day, and we have the summer bookended with a sweet day in the middle.
These are my ideas on the world, and I am a man who could make things happen if properly enabled. My contact info is in the right sidebar if you are the town planner of some sort of small Southern town looking to declare sovereignty and absolve yourself of the sins of the Federal American Empire.
Oh yeah, May music coming at you.
FIRST UP: If you can't be with the one you love, then fuck it, be sad about that shit!