[had been all set to talk about how Eazy-E was
problematic, and even more so how Kilo G was very problematic in this song, but
instead life did its thing where it throws something else at you because I had
this old truck in my yard for a long time and even before I get to that I guess
I should explain we spent too much money on Thanksgiving gluttony HOW DO PEOPLE
EVEN BLACK FRIDAY MUCH LESS SMALL BIZNESS SATURDAY AND ALSO CYBER MONDAY MUCH
LESS GIVING TUESDAY WTF EARTH AMERICANS? so we were short for a credit card
bill due this yesterday but there was the aforementioned truck sitting in the
yard for a long time because the clutch went out in it and I started driving
our second minivan when it went from first to second after I tore out all the
seats to make room for hay and wood and stuffs like that but a guy down the
road named Frosty THAT’S WHAT HE SAID OKAY THIS IS ALSO THE COUNTRY SO NOBODY’S
NAME IS THEIR REAL NAME EVER REAL NAMES ARE FOR ASSHOLES stopped by to ask
about the truck for himself or his grandson or somebody or another and I told
him I’d take $500 or best offer and once he saw the windshield was cracked he
came back on black Friday lol this was his black Friday shopping and he offered
me $300 cash and best believe I took it because that meant yesterday I could go
by the Lowes to pay the credit card bill that I wasn’t gonna be able to pay and
yes it was Lowes because nobody any longer actually builds and fixes stuff we
just use shoddy materials from box hardware stores to do shoddy DIY projects
all of which will crumble back into the Earth before our children are grown
since this is America where we have cheap wooden houses that cost exorbitant
prices because this is the end of our dying empire but anyways I rode to the
Lowes after work and paid the credit card bill even paid an extra $60 on it
because lol I had Frosty’s hundred dollar bills in my pocket and fuck it let’s
pay this credit down as quick as possible so I can finally move to Istanbul as
was written in the ancient prophecies of the wild bird that returned to
conference with his eastern brethren and realize the dreams of the ancestors
THAT IS FUTURE MYTHOLOGY SORRY FOR THE TANGENT and after paying the bill I
realized there was money leftover still to finally go get some new floodlights
to replace the burned out ones on the back of the house that have been burned
out for months maybe even a year who knows and of course I got green despite
all the stupid SUPPORT OUR VETERANS attempts to co-opt chill green floodlights
on the back yard and I bought the floodlight bulbs and as I walked there was a
dude standing a chill looking dude dressed in the khakis and mid-level dress
shirt of a man who is attempting to be professional from a perhaps toxic
masculine background, and when I say chill I hope you understand what I mean
because I don’t want to explicitly say he was african-american and force you to
think through that filter mostly because I don’t want to say it myself as that
shouldn’t have to be clarified as outside the norm but then again if I don’t
say it you will think through normal filters and once I tell you the last part
you will assume he was a white dude and you won’t think he was chill you will
think he was a stupid fratbro gone into hipster construction which he may still
be even though not white but anyways the hat he was wearing with this
construction professional outfit and his chill smile and trustable eyes THE
TRUSTABLE EYES WERE WHAT MADE ME THINK HE WAS CHILL YOU CANNOT LIE WITH YOUR
EYEBALLS REGARDLESS OF ETHNICITY THERE IS NO SCIENCE THAT PROVES THIS BUT I
BELIEVE IT was an Olde English 800 baseball hat not weird and hipster-y looking
but like he was a fucking distributor or some shit but who would be a distributor
of alcohol and wear an OE hat it doesn’t make sense but it happened as I walked
out from paying the Lowes bill after selling the junk truck in the yard and the
whole reason it happened was because I was gonna write a dumb blurb about how
Eazy-E was problematic and Kilo G from this song was even more problematic but
I was gonna then say that people who do rapgenius notations are more
problematic than that which is a pretty big jump because Kilo G and Eazy-E were
both sociopaths and perhaps rapgenius clarifiers are sociopaths of a different variety
in fact that’s likely true but ultimately none of it matter because life is
chill and one can sell old trucks and go pay bills and see chill dudes in for
some bizarre reason an OE hat and that is In Real Life and it always makes all
the problematic shit seem small in comparison because In Real Life shall always
impress]
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