25-Man Metaphysical Roster: A.F.C. Bournemouth

[nobody likely looking thru these old 25-Man posts I snuck in after the fact,

so good place to sneak in pic of tattoo of Andy Capp chasing a bastard cop]

[25-Man Metaphysical Roster is a football dork methodology meant to establish a listing of players who have been most active for English Premier League teams in their past 100 non-friendly matches. Essentially, it is calculated by minutes played, but weighted towards most recent games. The end result is a listing of the 25 players in a team’s recent history who have had the largest hand on their metaphysical sporting trajectory. The English Premier League was chosen because it is the highest level of football played in an English speaking country, and I speak English. Also, it is what comes on TV here in the USA, where I fucking live. And yet still I should clarify I hate English, and also America. Thus maybe I hate myself. Should I not fail in maintaining my unpaid deadline, a new 25-Man Metaphysical Roster will appear on the 1st and 15th of every month.]

Let’s go back through Bournemouth a second time, although this time with no blurbs because well you should know if you’ve been thumbing through the old shit.

#1: Steve Cook (same as last time Bournemouth was 25-Manned on 15-May-2017)

#2: Simon Francis (up from #3 last time)

#3: Charlie Daniels (down from #2 last time)

#4: Adam Smith (up from #5 last time)

#5: Joshua King (up from #7 last time)

#6: Nathan Ake (up from #19 last time)

#7: Ryan Fraser (up from #13 last time)

#8: Andrew Surman (same as last time)

#9: Dan Gosling (same as last time)

#10: Harry Arter (down from #6 last time)

#11: Asmir Begovic (previously #16 for Chelsea on 15-Sep-2017)

#12: Artur Boruc (down from #4 last time)

#13: Jordan Ibe (up from #17 last time)

#14: Callum Wilson (up from #15 last time)

#15: Lewis Cook (up from #24 last time)

#16: Marc Pugh (down from #10 last time)

#17: Junior Stanislas (down from #11 last time)

#18: Benik Afobe (down from #12 last time)

#19: Lys Mousset

#20: Jack Wilshere (down from #14 last time)

#21: Jermain Defoe (previously #2 for Sunderland on 15-Feb-2017)

#22: Tyrone Mings (down from #21 last time)

#23: Bradley Smith (up from #25 last time)

#24: Jack Simpson

#25: Lewis Grabban (down from #23 last time)