is often used by those having homes,
safety nets they can flip back on to,
family they can hit up if shit really gets deep.
it’s plenty of folks out here that’s actual rootless,
whatever home they had wasn’t safe or comfortable enough
to still be attached to, and them that they shared those spaces
with often helped make it that way,
so
they do what they can
to carve out a life without them traditional supports
or notions of “home” that they can always fall back on.
that shit is exhausting
absolutely fucking exhausting
to where you get mad at the sunshine for coming through the window
yet another morning, and you wish
there was a nice dry hole to fall into
for a couple weeks
not even a beach vacation
just fall into a fucking hole
cuddle up, and enjoy the quiet for a couple weeks.
rootlessness often comes with getting fucked up
because not having no home, not having nobody
who raised you to say “this is your home, whenever you need it”
and have it be a warm safe comfortable place
not having that shit will clutch your heart sometimes
by accident, not on no purpose, just grab your ass
right in the chest cavity, and you wanna ease that ache
take the edge off
creating your own
hole to fall into, to hide out
a couple weeks, months,
years, generations… however long
it takes to pretend you’re home
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